


Adventures in Babysitting

by Rainne



Category: Captain America (Movies), The Avengers (Marvel Movies), Thor (Movies)
Genre: Age Regression, Crack, Do not take this fic seriously, Fluff, Gen, Kid Fic
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2015-02-17
Updated: 2015-02-17
Packaged: 2018-03-13 10:28:04
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,103
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/3378119
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Rainne/pseuds/Rainne
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>We really should've hired a professional.</p>
            </blockquote>





	Adventures in Babysitting

**Author's Note:**

> I would like to blame suzukiblu for this, but it's really all my fault. Because I was complaining about hating my life and the story I'm trying to write, and so she made me write this, instead.
> 
> ". . . actually you know what, give me deaged Bucky and Darcy with Steve babysitting >> "
> 
> That's _literally_ what she said.
> 
> I... come to think of it, I may have actually glossed over the actual _babysitting_ part. Oh, well.

The first thing Steve notices when he barrels out of the elevator is the crying, and it brings him to a sudden, screeching halt.  Because it's not the sound of an adult crying in pain or sorrow.  That's the sound of a child.  Under other circumstances, he might even call it _squalling._

He moves forward up the smoky hallway with caution - he's learned by experience that there are many things that might disguise themselves as children to look harmless and innocent that are anything but.  And nobody knows what caused the explosion up here; they only know that Darcy was here, working late, and Bucky had come up to bring her food.

And there are never, ever supposed to be children on this floor.

The windows of Foster's laboratory have been blown out from the inside; the industrial carpet in the hallway is covered with rounded chunks of safety glass.  Steve moves slowly, dragging his feet rather than stepping, to avoid crunching sounds, and he leans carefully around the edge of the window.

And from inside, he hears a voice.  A terrifyingly familiar voice.

It is saying, "Hush, now, hush, you got to stop cryin', you're okay, you're not hurt, okay?  Stop cryin', you're gonna get us in trouble, stop it!"

Steve blinks.  He leans a little farther.  And he stares.  And he says, "Bucky?"

Bucky, who is _almost_ ten if Steve is gauging his memories correctly, whips around, his eyes huge and scared.  "Who're you?" he demands, throwing his arms out to the sides as if to block Steve's view of the tiny girl behind him, whose screams have turned into heartbreaking sobs.

Steve pulls off his helmet and says, "Bucky... don't you recognize me?"

Bucky's face screws up for a second with the effort of thinking, and then suddenly smoothes out again in shock.  "Stevie?"

"Yeah, Buck," Steve says.  "It's me."

Bucky steps forward, his jaw dropping in awe.  "But... but how'd you get so big?"

"Well, that's kind of a long story," Steve replies.  He looks around the smoke-filled lab.  "You think you can tell me what happened here?"

"I dunno, Stevie, honest," Bucky says, with that wide-eyed look that he always puts on when he's trying to convince a grown-up that he didn't do anything.  "A minute ago I was playin' stickball with Tommy Dorsey, and then I was here."

"Uh-huh," Steve replies, a grin cracking his face despite the seriousness of the situation.  "Someday, Bucky, you'll remember I know you since you were five.  That face?  I know that face.  You did something."

"No, really, I swear!" Bucky insists.  "I swear it on... on my signed Dazzy Vance!"

And that convinces Steve, because there was nothing Bucky owned at nine years old that he valued more than that baseball card.  "All right," he says.  "How about your little pal there?"

"I dunno about her, neither," Bucky says, turning to look at her.  "She ain't bleedin', though.  I checked."

"Well, that's good news."  Steve hoists himself through the window and crosses the room, crouching down beside Bucky. 

Darcy at four or so is an angelic looking creature with a mass of dark hair and huge blue eyes.  Her little lips are turned down in a tragic moué, and fat tears are running down her cheeks.  Steve sighs softly, shaking his head.  "Hey, Darcy," he says softly.

She blinks at him.  Her eyes shimmer and well up again.  He puts a finger on her lips.  "No more crying unless you show me where it hurts."

Her lip wobbles, but she sucks it up.  He says, "Do you remember me?"  When she shakes her head, he says, "My name's Steve.  I'm your friend.  And this is Bucky; he's your friend, too.  And we're gonna take care of you.  Okay?"  He reaches out and tucks his hands under her armpits and he stands, swinging her up onto his hip.  "Let's get out of this nasty lab and go someplace nicer.  We can have a snack, maybe some ice cream.  Sound good?"

"Yeah!" Bucky exclaims.  Darcy nods silently, then buries her forehead against the side of his neck. 

Steve reaches out and loops his arm around Bucky's waist, lifting him up.  Bucky squirms, trying to get down.  "Aw, c'mon, Stevie, I can walk!"

"No, you can't," Steve replies.  "The hallway's full of glass and you don't have any shoes."

Bucky looks down at his feet and startles when he realizes that Steve is correct; in fact, all either child is wearing is the shirts they had on earlier; both of them shrank out of their shoes, pants, and underthings.  "JARVIS," Steve says, "could you have some clothes delivered for these two?  Just a few sets, maybe, to cover them until we get them fixed?"

"Of course, Captain," JARVIS replies, and both kids startle, looking around for the source of the voice.

"That's JARVIS," Steve explains as he crosses the room to leave by the door, crunching his way back up the hallway to the elevators.  "He runs the place."  He tilts his head at Darcy.  "Can you say hi?"

The voice that comes out of the child is tiny, a startling opposition to the screaming she was doing just a minute ago or the voice of the adult she would become.  "Hi," she murmurs.

But JARVIS hears her.  "Hello, Miss Lewis," he says.  "And Master Barnes, as well."

Bucky blinks, looking up.  "Hi, JARVIS," he replies, his face splitting in a grin.  "That's pretty swell."

Steve grins as well, setting Bucky on his feet in the elevator.  "Yeah," he says.  "It kind of is."

He takes the kids upstairs to the common room, gets them into chairs at the kitchen table, and makes them both eat a slice of bread with peanut butter before letting them have ice cream.  By the time they're eating the ice cream, Tony and Bruce are there, staring in shock.  They have JARVIS take readings and do scans, and then they head down to Foster's lab to see if they can figure out what blew up and why; they would just ask Foster, but she's conveniently gone to Asgard.

Which is how Steve spends the next two days chasing two children around the tower.  But Tony and Bruce are able to fix the machine that blew Darcy and Bucky back in time, and fortunately they are able to do it soon enough to keep Steve from killing both of them.  As it stands, Steve kept a running tally.  Darcy owes him cookies, and peanut butter swirl brownies, _and_ a scalp massage, and Bucky... well, Bucky just _owes him._


End file.
